


one love, two mouths

by mochis



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Anal Sex, Beach Sex, Biting, Blindfolds, Blood, Blow Jobs, Body Worship, Choking, Christmas Lights, Cock Rings, Daddy Kink, Dom/sub, Edgeplay, Exhibitionism, Frottage, Gay Sex, Japanese Rope Bondage, Light BDSM, Lingerie, Love, Love Bites, Love Confessions, M/M, Masochism, Mutual Masturbation, Oral Sex, Phone Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Praise Kink, Rope Bondage, Rough Sex, S&M, Sadism, Sex Tapes, Sex Toys, Sexual Fantasy, Sexual Frustration, Smut, Spanking, Vibrators, christmas lights bondage ??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-11
Updated: 2018-05-26
Packaged: 2018-09-08 01:18:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8824411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mochis/pseuds/mochis
Summary: He's kinky but unsure of himself, and the other's there to help him figure himself out (with lots of rope).





	1. flawless

**Author's Note:**

> ok am i the only one who thinks alfred would be really into a lot of shit?? like low key a really kinky masochist?? and who else to fuck him up than kiku, the sadistic bastard,

Alfred had met him during his second year of university, innocently enough.

Yet at that point in his life, he hadn’t truly figured himself out quite yet. He knew he was very much attracted to men just as much as he was attracted to women, but being nineteen and a political science major left little time for an adventurous sex life. Alfred didn’t know quite what he  _ liked -  _ he had an idea of how rough he liked it, how far he’d be willing to go with someone he was in love with (or  _ not _ ; that was another gray area he hadn’t thought about but it excited him in several different ways), but none of that truly mattered because it wasn’t as if he would actually find someone who would be  _ willing _ to do the sick things he thought up of. 

To be fair, the “sick things” he had conjured in his mind on sweaty nights of no sleep and hypersexuality were not as sick as they could possibly be. Alfred had heard of much worse things that people would engage in, and his late night fantasies were nothing too extreme because he hadn’t  _ done  _ anything extreme. Vanilla one night stands left him feeling dissatisfied and irritated and the few relationships he had been in were too soft and sweet for his needy tastes. 

But when he found Kiku, it was different.  _ He  _ was different. 

The first thing Alfred noted was that he was quiet. His voice was as delicate as glass, flowing like milk and almost as sugary as honey. There was something about the way his dull, coffee-colored eyes met his blue ones, something about the pink hue dusted across his cheeks or the way his smaller, creamier hands seemed so  _ skilled _ . He was not outright masculine nor feminine. Everything about Kiku was mysterious yet welcomed him  all the same, and Alfred found himself drawn to him as if in a trance. 

It didn’t take long for the two to become close. Alfred was accomplished in the art of socializing, and Kiku’s walls were gradually chipped away by the american’s boisterous personality. At first, they kept to themselves - physically - and made no move to insinuate something more than just mindful friends. Then there was a night of sudden hypersexuality and a lack of self restraint from Alfred’s end and a willingness to oblige and cater to his needs on Kiku’s end, which sent the two past the point of no return, into a mostly physical yet somehow still emotionally fulfilling relationship. 

After waking up with his wrists bruised and slightly red from being bound together by a nearby usb cord Kiku had snatched from his desk, Alfred’s affection towards the smaller man still sleeping beside him swelled. His mind ran through the events that happened the night before - the feeling of Kiku’s hands on his neck, his arms, his hips, his thighs, the excitement of being bound and left at the mercy of someone else, the way his heart rate accelerated when he felt his hair being pulled to meet those coffee-colored eyes. Kiku had not denied him when he demanded to be hit or tied up. The blonde’s bottom lip was swollen and busted from being bitten, but he found that it didn’t bother him in the slightest; nor did the other markings left by Kiku upset him, either. 

There was a talk, of course. Safe words were established and fantasies were discussed in the safety and privacy of Alfred’s dorm room, the curtains and locked door shielding them from prying eyes and eavesdropping ears. He finally communicated what he had been debating with himself for the past few months in simple words: 

“I sort of— I wanna be tied up. And, you know, fucked with.”

The redness of his cheeks was endearing, and Kiku reached out to cup a side of his face. “Are you...asking  _ me _ to do that to you?” 

The freckled blonde gave a lovesick grin. “I think you're the only one who can fuck with me in the right way.” 

Before either of them could say more, Kiku is on his lips and biting down on his bottom lip to reopen the wound, the bitter taste of copper mixing with saliva in a messy and hungry kiss. There is blood trailing down Alfred’s chin when they pull away and in that moment with half lidded eyes and scruffy bedhead, Kiku thinks Alfred is the most beautiful person in the entire goddamn world and he voices this, earning another blush from the blonde. 

Their relationship after that is far from the vanilla experiences Alfred’s had in the past, and he’s more than thankful. When he isn’t preoccupied with study sessions or lectures he is on his knees or blindfolded, sometimes left loose but most of the time he is bound because Kiku learns to know exactly what the american likes and what he likes is being  _ abused. _ The sentence that he had mentioned at first with fidgeting hands and bright red cheeks— “being fucked with”— eventually grew to mean Alfred liked being driven to the edge, and the means it took to bring him to the edge varied. 

It was a month into their relationship that something besides Kiku had entered Alfred. Bright pink and of a reasonable size (but Alfred could not  _ see _ for himself what was entering him as he had been left blindfolded), it satisfied the blonde well enough for the first moments before he heard a soft  _ click _ in front of him, the sudden vibrations making his voice come out strangled and pitchy. He had never felt anything besides the warmth that was Kiku inside of him and never  _ favored _ anything besides Kiku inside of him, and it was not as if the vibrator had completely won his heart— but with the way Kiku had been controlling the intensity of the vibrations so that every time he would come close the intensity would be brought back down to the lightest level was truly a work of  _ art _ . 

Though, after edging for what felt like  _ hours _ , Alfred had grown desperate. “Please, let-let me—”

His response was cut off by being backhanded across the face. It surprised him pleasantly in more than one places. “I will decide when you’ve had enough.” 

Alfred can taste copper in his mouth, and swallows it down with a delighted shiver. He’s had enough of being teased. “Is that all you’ve got, then? That’s cute.”

His hair is being pulled and the smile is evident in Kiku’s voice. “I’ll show you cute.” 

The blonde heard him move away and the sound of a bag’s zipper being opened and closed. The vibrator was on its lowest setting and Alfred’s cock was flush against his abdomen, aching for release and his mind was too busy thinking of how  _ sweet  _ it will feel when he finally comes that he barely recognized something cold being wrapped around the base of his member tightly. 

He can’t see and that scared him into more arousal. “Wha—? Kiku, what did you...”

“You’re the cute one, now, with that ring around you,” Kiku said, and while Alfred is blind he knows he’s grinning. “Try coming with that.” 

The vibrator is suddenly sent into a higher intensity and before Alfred could register his situation he is screaming, the pleasure of being restricted driving him wild. Pain had mixed with bliss at that point and he can feel his precum leaking onto his abdomen, trailing down to stain his sheets. He had been denied his orgasm by Kiku plenty of times before, but with an actual ring locked around his cock the denial is twenty times sweeter, the ache in his belly coiling tighter and tighter.

“ _ Hurts _ ,” Alfred manages to moan, but felt no need to use the safe word. 

The blonde feels a dip in the bed, followed by two thighs straddling him. A chaste kiss is pressed to his neck, and he tips his head back to allow more access. “I know. You look perfect.” 

The kiss turns into a bite, drawing another whimper from Alfred. “Want you.”

“To do what?”

He considers being honest and begging him to take the vibrator out, to fuck him and let him get off— but something else tumbles out of his mouth with just as much need. “Hurt me more.”

Kiku’s coffee-colored vision turns lovesick pink. He reaches for the lube on the bedside table and switches the vibrator off, carefully sliding it out of Alfred to toss it carelessly on the ground beside them. The blindfold is taken off because he wants to see those beautiful blue eyes screwed shut when he enters him, penetrates him and litters his body with bruises and marks, when the denial of his orgasm brings him to the point of tears. 

Alfred blinks a few times, clearing his vision and finally getting a look at the silver ring keeping him from coming. His erection still stands, practically ready to burst but he knows they aren’t finished yet and are far from finishing, and the thought makes his heart beat faster against his ribcage. Kiku is finished prepping himself, and meets his lips with a wolfish appetite that leaves Alfred dizzy and anxious for more. 

“Get on your knees.” It is said so gently that it was almost taken as a request instead of an order, but the blonde wastes no time in following directions. He had gotten over the embarrassment of this position long after the first time Kiku had practically drilled him into the bed. 

Even with the blindfold off, he is oblivious as to what the smaller man is doing behind him. His wrists are bound and he is still completely at his mercy, and his cock throbs against the cold metal constricting it. A familiar warmth touches his entrance and he shivers in anticipation, crying out as he is filled once again. Kiku is unsparing and waits no longer than a few seconds before beginning to move, nails digging into his hips hard enough to leave bright red marks and it feels  _ good  _ to be hurt in that bad way, feels good to be left defenseless against him. 

His moans are throaty and sweet, and Kiku feels nearly drunk off of the sounds and the tightness that was Alfred. The ropes around his wrists were nice enough, but he’s already looking forward to completely bounding the blonde up, an intricate system of red ropes going across his chest and stomach, connecting to the arms behind his back. His sun kissed skin would be left so red and bright, the outline of the ropes leaving a beautiful work of art across his body. He would be so gorgeous, Kiku will  _ make  _ him so gorgeous so that no other hands would touch him except his own.

He is pulled from his fantasies when Alfred sobs, imploring him to remove the ring. “I can’t take it, I-I need to...”

Slender fingers tugged at his hair, yanking him from his position against the mattress to sit up, now bouncing against Kiku’s lap. “Does it hurt?” 

Alfred swallows thickly but the safeword is still far from his mind. “Yes, yes,  _ yes,  _ it hurts so good but I really want to— I need to come, Kiku!”

He hadn’t used the safe word, but he was feeling gracious. The ring comes off and Alfred is suddenly too sensitive to Kiku’s hand pumping him and being fucked at the same time, and he comes with a scream in his hands and the sheets beneath them. The man behind him doesn’t slow his pace, even after Alfred has fallen back down onto the mattress, whimpering his thanks as he comes down from his climax. His hair is disheveled, eyes half lidded and while he looked like a fucking mess he was still  _ Kiku’s _ fucking mess and seeing him undone is what finally pushes him to the edge. Alfred shivers at the flood of warmth inside of him and bites his lip to keep from moaning, drawing blood.

They are both equally spent, panting hard to catch their breaths. His bounds are gently untied and he rubs at his wrists, the marks making him smile. 

Kiku catches this, takes his wrists into his own hands. “Next time there will be more.” 

“Rope?” The blonde looks hopeful as Kiku presses kisses to the wounds. 

He smiles against his skin. “Everything.” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this will probably be more than one chapter bc boy does alfred want a lot of shit done to him  
> also "flawless" by the neighborhood is their song in this fic like it summarizes how they feel it's kinky and obsessive and great


	2. wiped out!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shorter chapter, but still just as kinky

“Alfred, is this a bad time?” 

The blonde gulps, glancing down towards the raven-haired head kneeled in front of his hips. “No, dude, you’re fine. Room’s a mess, though, so mind if we talk out here?”

Kiku grins wickedly, keeping his eyes on Alfred’s flushed face as he quietly undoes the button to his jeans before moving to his zipper. For someone about to get a blowjob, Alfred is doing a remarkable job of keeping his voice down and keeping his bottom half concealed with the door.

“Of course,” Kiku recognizes the voice to be one of their classmates, a wavy haired blonde named Francis. He doesn’t talk to him very much, but apparently he and Alfred were close. “Arthur and I were about to head out to grab a bite. We wanted to know if you and Kiku would want to join us?”

The raven-haired man rolls his eyes, pulling the waistband of Alfred’s boxers down. The offer is actually quite thoughtful, considering Arthur could hardly stand being in the same room with the american, but they obviously have other plans for the evening. He emphasizes this by taking hold of the blonde’s erection, beginning to pump slowly. 

The blonde nearly loses his composure when he feels his boxers leave his waist. “That’s really nice of you to offer,” He feels something wet run along the length of his cock and his breath hitches in his throat, but he tries to disguise it as a cough. “But -  _ ah _ \- I’m-I’m not feeling so well tonight. Probably coming down with something.”

Kiku nearly chuckles at his poor attempt to cover up his moan, licking the head clean of precum. His hands are on his hips to keep the blonde in place as he takes half of his length into his mouth, a tease. He feels a hand grab a fistful of his hair, desperate and pleading. Whether is was a plea to keep going or stop before he  _ actually  _ moaned in front of Francis, Kiku had no idea. He went with the first choice (knowing it would drive Alfred mad) and kept a slow pace. 

He can hear the slight disappointment in Francis’ voice. “That’s unfortunate. I actually miss your company.” A laugh, light and honest. “Arthur is coming around, as well.” 

“Really? It’s a-about time.” Alfred tries to laugh, but it comes out breathless and lacking in  volume. “Maybe next time, though? Kiku would -  _ really  _ be up for a double date.” 

It’s a true statement, but right now, he didn’t want to think of a double date. He wanted to take more of Alfred into his mouth and does so, another one of Alfred’s hands going to run through his hair. The slight pain of having his hair pulled is exhilarating and Kiku uses this as encouragement to keep going, taking Alfred down to the base. He knows it’s so  _ easy  _ to get Alfred turned on and always knows the  _ easiest  _ ways to get him to come, melting into putty in his hands with just a simple blowjob or just the right type of dirty talk. He’s come to know the blonde’s tastes and continues to build his preferences through surprises such as this one; nothing builds up an exhibition kink more than practically receiving a blowjob in front of one of your friends. 

“Alright, I’ll let Arthur know. Hopefully you don’t come down with anything serious,” Alfred is positively screaming mentally for him to leave so he can come in private, Kiku’s tongue doing absolute wonders to his breathing. “Try to keep your temperature down, your face is flushed.” 

He nods and politely wishes him a nice evening before virtually slamming the door closed, knees buckling as Kiku bobbed his head up and down the length of his cock. “Are you - fucking  _ crazy?”  _

Kiku’s eyes meet Alfred’s half-lidded ones almost innocently, were it not for the mouth wrapped around him so erotically. His lips leave his member with a  _ pop,  _ and he wipes his mouth with the back of his hand while the other stays stroking his erection. “Only because you  _ like _ fucking crazy.”

“Francis could have seen, or could have  _ heard _ —”

“You were hard the entire time, Alfred. If you were really worried,” he palms the head of his dick, and the blonde above him throws his head back against the wall with a groan, “you would have gone soft, don’t you think?” 

He’s too embarrassed and too wrapped up in the pleasure to admit that Kiku had a point. Instead, he bucks into the hand wrapped around his flushed member and cries out when he feels his hot mouth taking him all in again. He isn’t about to admit that the risk of being caught  _ did  _ make him more than a little excited, just as he isn’t about to admit to anyone else besides Kiku that he liked being bound and gagged. “Just - Just warn me next time.” 

He doesn’t get a reply as Kiku is clearly busy and concentrating on getting Alfred to achieve his orgasm, speeding his pace to match his thrusts. Both of them knew that of course there would be no warning next time, for the surprise is what made the pleasure and orgasm so much  _ better.  _ Plus, the completely startled and near angry look that Alfred gave Kiku was priceless.

It doesn’t take much more for Alfred to finally give a strangled cry, hands returning to fist into Kiku’s hair as he releases his climax into his mouth, legs trembling. The blonde slides down the wall after he feels Kiku pull away from him, coming down from the high and panting. The man in front of him gives a satisfied smirk before pulling the other into a  kiss, and Alfred’s blue eyes widen slightly as he feels his own orgasm enter his mouth, warm and wet. He doesn’t think twice before he swallows, mostly out of instinct but also because the idea of Kiku sharing his own come with him made his heart race and mind short circuit. 

They pull away and there is a bit of his seed running down his own chin, but he doesn’t complain. Kiku wipes it away with his thumb before licking it off. “So, I take it we have a double date with Francis and Arthur soon?”

Alfred’s mind is still dizzy from what just happened, but he gives a lopsided grin. “Yeah - Yes, we do. Do you wanna go down on me during that, too?”

“Now you’re just asking for too much.” 


	3. staying up

Winter break comes and puts a momentary halt to their sexual encounters, but does nothing to hinder their actual relationship. They are both in their respective homes visiting family and friends, thousands of miles away from each other, and while they aren't able to talk very much on the phone or skype very often, neither of minds. It's only temporary, and soon enough they would be be back to spending much of their down time together; with or without rope.

It's on one night that Alfred feels a yearning for the rope, the blindfold, the various toys— everything, but most of all he misses Kiku. He remembers the feeling of his hands on his body, harsh and gentle simultaneously as they manage to reduce him to a mewling mess. He remembers his voice, soft as fleece, whispering praises and degradations into his ear that sends chills down his spine, and his louder, passionate voice that he reserves specifically for Alfred's cock when he decides let let him take charge. He thinks of the creaminess of Kiku's pale skin underneath his fingertips, the way his blush reaches down to his neck when he's flustered.

A blanket covers him and he lays on his side, and it's when Alfred snakes a hand down towards his sweatpants that he thanks his lucky stars that the rest of his family had gone to bed long ago. He isn't surprised to find that he's already half hard, and lightly palms himself through the warm fabric while biting his lip to keep himself from outright moaning. His thoughts drift as his eyes slip shut, thinking back to his dorm room and his beloved partner who was probably missing him just as much as he was. If Kiku were here right now, how would he touch him?

Alfred's hand moved to grip himself through his boxers, not allowing himself to touch his dick directly just yet. The blonde wanted to draw this out just as Kiku would do, tease himself just as Kiku would. He begins to stroke slowly, breath hitching in his throat while his thoughts are consumed by Kiku, Kiku, _Kiku—_

He jumps at the sound of his phone vibrating against the wood of his bed side table, nearly rattling off onto the floor. He softly groans, annoyed at the interruption until he reads the caller ID: Kiku Honda. Alfred holds his phone to his ear with his free hand, shifting to sit up against his bed frame but choosing not to remove the hand down his pants. Besides, he figured his boyfriend wouldn't mind that he was touching himself to the thought of him; if anything, it would be flattering. His voice is somewhat shaky and wavers a bit as he answers, "Hello?"

"Nearly everyone is drunk, and I managed to slip into a bathroom to call you," his voice is almost breathless, but for different reasons. Alfred uses this and slides the waistband of his sweatpants and boxers lower. "Is it too late to talk?"

He wants to smile, but it quickly melts into another lip bite as Alfred takes firm hold of himself sans any clothing. "I-I'm always up for you, babe. How's your night going?"

If Kiku notices the slight change in his voice, he does not say anything to point it out. Instead he takes a small pause before answering, "I would be lying if I said it wasn't fun. Karaoke was going okay until the liquor was brought out, and my brother passed his four cup limit a few hours ago." He laughs, and it sends a jolt down Alfred's spine. "Looks like I’m the designated driver for tonight. What about you?"

"I'm alright," he's stroking at a slow pace, now, trying to keep his voice from becoming too breathless. "Everyone passed out a few hours ago, but I c-couldn't sleep."

"Thinking of me?"

The blonde tries to chuckle, but it comes out as a near moan. He feels his cheeks begin to flush and his hand pauses momentarily as he quickly answers, "Yeah, right. I'm— just too tired to sleep."

Another pause from Kiku, and Alfred resumes his ministrations, letting his eyes slip shut while he waits for his response. A part of him knew that moan was done on purpose to let Kiku know what he was doing, but another part of him was embarrassed he actually let himself moan into the phone. His family was asleep and his room happened to be a little ways from the rest of their rooms, but he was still slightly anxious to let his voice out. But with Kiku's voice filling his ears, he couldn't resist not using it to help him reach his climax.

"You're touching yourself, aren't you?" The smirk is evident in his voice.

"Am— _ah_ — not." He insists weakly, swiping the precome from the head of his dick with his thumb.

There's the sound of a door closing, of a lock being done. He could only guess that Kiku had locked himself into a bathroom stall. "No? You weren't thinking of what I would do to you if I were there?"

 _Yes yes yes._ “No.”

“You’re an awful liar, Alfred.” His voice dips down lower, bordering sultry territory. “I know how you sound when you’re close.”

“I’m not—” he gives a squeeze to the base of his cock, enticing another moan, “I’m not close. Not yet.”

Another pause, and Alfred can faintly hear a zipper being undone. An excited shiver runs down his spine, making him roll his hips into his hand as he imagines Kiku touching himself just as he is. His pace is a leisurely one as he waits for a response, stopping when he hears his voice again. It’s a little shy but still manages to be sensual. “Well, if you aren’t close, I have a sort of...game, that we could both play.”

“A game?” He rakes his nails along the side of his sensitive member. “What kind?”

Kiku’s earlier timid voice is replaced with a coy tone as he explains, “We count down from one hundred. Whoever doesn’t make it to one loses.” He’s speaking almost in a rush, getting the words out quickly. The blonde can hear his breathing on the other end and can’t help the arousal that builds in the pit of his stomach as he pictures him catching up to match how hard Alfred is. “The punishment can be discussed later.”

Alfred’s dick twitches at the mention of a punishment. “You’re on.”

Kiku’s laughter is low, almost a pant. “I’ll start, then. One hundred...”

“Ninety-nine.” He takes hold of himself again, pumping slowly. He was painfully hard, but the motivation to win was enough to hold him back from a quick orgasm.

Whatever the punishment, Alfred definitely wanted to dish it out to Kiku. As they kept counting back and forth, he wonders what the punishment would be; would it include blindfolds? Rope? A gag? Maybe he’d be able to talk him into getting a collar at some point. The thought of being made to wear it in public draws out a particularly high moan as they reached eighty-four, but he withholds himself from increasing his pace. He can’t see him, but the blonde can certainly picture Kiku based off of how he sounds. Unlike Alfred, he isn’t letting out direct moans or whimpers, but his breathing is slowly becoming more and more winded, and his voice itself is becoming borderline husky. It’s completely unfair for him to sound like that during a competition— almost as if it’s on purpose.

 _Two can play at that game,_ Alfred thinks to himself as he cradles the phone in between his ear and shoulder, freeing one hand to tease at a nipple under his shirt. “Seventy-eight.”

“Seventy-seven,” There’s a curse, but it's quiet and muffled. _“Fuck.”_

It’s rare to hear him curse, and the blonde smirks before letting another moan out as he pinches the perky bud between his fingers. “Seventy-six. Someone seems to be close.”

The high-pitched waver in Kiku’s voice makes his stomach dip, flip flopping in arousal. “As if— _shit._ Seventy-five.”

Despite his teasing, Alfred knows his own arousal that is pooling in the pit of stomach is threatening to overflow any minute, now. It's too much; imagining how his boyfriend looks— locked into a public bathroom stall and touching himself because of Alfred’s noises on the other end, eyes screwed shut in pleasure while a shaky hand held the phone to his ear. While he usually took charge in intimate situations, his rarely shown submissive side is possibly just as mind-blowingly attractive as his dominant side, in the american’s opinion.

Yet he is still determined to win, and continues to edge  himself until he is panting and biting down on his hand to keep from moaning too loudly.

Kiku is in no better shape. They are on sixty-nine, and before Alfred can muster up the strength to even _chuckle_ at the number, the other practically growls. “This game is stupid.”

“You’re the one who suggested it.” Alfred doesn’t even smile; his hand is slick with precome and the pleasure is beginning to _hurt_ in too many good ways.

“Shut it.” His voice is just as shaky as Alfred’s, but he doesn’t seem to be giving up. “Sixty-eight.”

The blonde nearly groans, but bites down on his thumb once more to keep his voice down to a whimper. “Sixty-seven.”

Despite his mind being clouded with pleasure, he wholeheartedly agrees with Kiku on the subject of the game being absolutely stupid. Though, were it not for the game, he probably wouldn’t have been able to hear such noises from his boyfriend. Not to mention getting a rather nice mental  image of him locked in a bathroom stall and jerking off. This game is stupid, yes, but it is also very satisfying.

At this point, they’ve reached the fifties and Alfred is positively aching to release, having forgotten about the punishment and reward for the ridiculous game. The sheets are kicked off and he is being fueled by Kiku’s strangled moans on the other end, and he briefly wonders if he’s trying to keep quiet because there is another person in the bathroom with him and that possibility is almost enough to send him tumbling over the edge.

“Fuck this game,” His blue eyes are screwed shut, the grip on his phone tight. “You win, I can’t-can’t do it anymore.”

How Kiku manages to chuckle - albeit breathlessly and practically coming off as a mewl - is beyond Alfred, but he doesn’t dwell on it too much. “Let me hear you, Alfred. You know— _god, fuck_ — how gorgeous you sound when you come.”

Hearing Kiku call him “gorgeous” in what makes him see stars behind his eyelids, his thumb torn away from his mouth to let his voice out just as his boyfriend wants. Even when they aren’t physically together, he ends up pleasing Kiku, and he’s sure he’ll be able to laugh about that later when he isn’t riding his orgasm out in his hand and listening to the man on the other end reach his climax shortly afterwards. Their breathing is heavy and ragged, and for a moment Alfred considers simply falling asleep like this, until he hears movement on the other line.

It’s the sound of paper being rustled. “We couldn’t even manage half way through. In some ways I’m not surprised.”

The blonde is drained but the corners of his lips quirk into a smile. “I sort of knew you would win, though.” He pushes himself off of his pillow, reaching for the box of tissues sitting on his side table. “So, what punishment do you have in mind?”

“We can discuss that later. I’m sure you’re tired,” he replies, and the fond smile is evident in his voice. “And I should be getting back. Yao must be wondering where I’ve gone off to.”

Alfred is cleaned up, then, the tissues he used balled and tossed away. “We can talk it over when we get back on campus. Which can’t get here fast enough.” He settles underneath the sheets again, feeling warm and oddly fulfilled, despite Kiku not being there with him. “Miss you.”

The door to the stall Kiku is in is undone, and he hears it close. “I do, too. I hate when you get cheesy after sex.”

“This wasn’t technically sex, though.”

“Phone sex, same difference.”

“You just hate when I get cheesy, period.”

“This is true.” Alfred can hear water running. “You should get some sleep. I’ll message you in the morning.”

He doesn’t want to hang up, but his eyelids are becoming heavier and threatening to close. “Mmh, fine. G’night, Keeks.”

“Good night, Alfred.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> someone asked me if the chapter names are based off of songs and yes! they're based off of songs from the neighborhood —✩


	4. daddy issues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gosh it's taken me quite a while to think of something else to add to this series. i actually started this chapter a month ago but only now got the *spark* to finish it up.  
> the chapter title should give you a bit of a hint as to what kink this chapter deals with. not my cup of tea, but it was fun to write.

The first time Alfred says it, it’s a joke.

The phrase leaves his lips in a coy tone, almost eaten up by his laughter as Kiku trails ticklish kisses down his jaw. They are spending the evening in Kiku’s dorm for once, swaddled up in warm sheets and even warmer arms. “ _Daddy_ , you tease.”

Kiku stops, but it’s only because he’s laughing a bit too hard in between kisses. “You’re impossible. How many kinks can a person have?”

“I do _not_ have a daddy kink,” He says, _almost_ completely confidently. A part of him knows the truth and he's sure Kiku could see right through him. “But if you're into that...”

“I'm into anything you’re into, Alfred.”

“I’m into you.”

The smaller of the two blushes, suddenly bashful. He rolls his eyes and keeps a content smile on his lips as one hand reaches down to lace their fingers together. “You have good taste.”

The rest of the evening is spent (surprisingly) innocently, the duo preferring to simply lay in each other’s warmth and security until the next morning’s classes. Kiku’s alarm rouses them awake, and they part with a kiss and a promise of an eventful evening in Alfred’s dorm. The blonde’s heart flutters for the rest of the day and while he desperately needs to pay attention in his economics class,  he can’t help but let his mind wander to different things - specifically, a certain raven-haired boy.

(Kiku would admit later on, _years_ later, that he would often do the same during his classes.)

As Alfred finds himself in between a pair of jean-clad legs after the day’s classes, his words from yesterday snake their way into his mind. He looks up towards his boyfriend as he undoes his button and zipper. “Do you remember how I said I didn’t have a daddy kink?”

His face is slightly flushed, but it doesn’t hinder the smirk on Kiku’s lips. He’s settled against the headboard of Alfred’s bed fully dressed, having had little time to barely kick off his shoes before the american was all over him. “Don’t tell me you’ve changed your mind.”

“I just,” He licks his lips as he pushes the waistband of the other’s boxers down, and Kiku does not suppress his shiver. “I’ve been thinking about it and it sort of sounds hot, you know?”

“I’m not going to disagree with you. I did say I was into anything you were.” While the thought of Alfred calling him by that particular title did excite him, he tried not to let it show. How he found himself perfectly capable of tying the blonde up with a straight face but not being able to control his blush over being called “daddy” was beyond him in that moment. All he wanted to focus on was the tongue currently swirling around the head of his dick.

When Kiku ran a hand through his locks, Alfred closed his eyes in content, and the second time the word leaves his mouth it is said with the utmost sincerity. _“Daddy.”_

The asian flushes a deeper shade of red. This isn’t supposed to make his heart beat so fast.

Alfred’s blowjobs are sweet; he likes taking his time. He likes to see how Kiku squirms underneath his tongue and mouth, making sure to lightly drag his teeth along the shaft just how he likes it. The eye contact only serves to arouse them even more as he brings his baby blues up to meet chocolate brown. They’re big and round and so goddamn _endearing_ that it nearly undoes Kiku every time, watching him as he bobs his head up and down, lips as pink as the blush on his cheeks.

When he feels the familiar build up about to burst, he tugs at the golden locks between his fingers. “Alfred, I’m about to...”

The blonde releases his dick with a _pop,_ wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “Wait, not yet. I actually wanted to ask you if you could do something for me.” He’s blushing and Kiku feels his heart skip another beat, feels a warmth melt throughout his chest and down to his toes.

“What is it?”

“Could you maybe... use that rope on me again? But more of it. More than just my wrists.”

When Kiku doesn’t answer right away, Alfred rises to meet the asian’s lips in a kiss. “Please? _Daddy.”_

He isn’t sure how he hasn’t come yet or how he’s even off the bed and scrambling for the deep red rope hidden under Alfred’s bed, but somehow Kiku is doing it and undoing the knots he’d previously tied in them while the boy still on the bed begins to strip. Alfred has asked him to tie him up multiple times before - almost too many times to count on both hands - but something about the way the word “daddy” was tacked onto the request was almost too much for Kiku. He’s wanted nothing more than to practice more intricate rope bondage on the blonde and to think he would _finally_ be able to see that freckled body covered in rope burns makes his hands tremble in excitement.

The actual tying doesn’t take too long. Kiku has practiced on his own in preparation, and Alfred is more than eager to become restrained. He doesn’t cover every part of Alfred’s body - there are knots tied on his hips and in the middle of his chest that draw attention to his pecs and ass. Then there are more tied behind his back, rendering his arms completely useless against the thick thread as his wrists are tied together and rest against the small of his back. He’s erect as rope is tied around the base of his member, and the rigger smiles to himself.

He’s nearly perfect, Kiku thinks.

Next is the blindfold, which is settled over his baby blue eyes gingerly. Kiku’s hand lingers on his cheek for a moment, cupping it tenderly. “You’re so beautiful. Such a good boy.”

Alfred whines when the contact is gone. Kiku reaches down into his backpack to rummage for something, pulling it out with slight hesitation. He undoes the buckle and slips it onto the other’s neck, buckling it so it rests just above the dip in his collar bones.

Now, he thinks with a flutter in his chest, he looks absolutely perfect.

The leather is cold against Alfred’s skin. “What did you put - ?”

“A collar.” It is red and matches the rope bound around his skin flawlessly. “If you didn’t look so stunning, I would take you right now.” A teasing hand palms the head of the blonde’s dick.

He feels his dick twitch when he learns that he’s been collared. “Kiku, _please_ -”

The hand is gone, and Alfred groans. Kiku smirks to himself. “That isn’t what we agreed to call me. Do you need reminding?”

The offer is _oh so_ tempting, but the bound boy is not in the mood to be feisty. Tonight he is submissive and will _beg_ if he needs to.

(He knows Kiku loves it when he begs and a part of him loves that he loves it and will beg for centuries if it means it would make Kiku happy).

“Kiku - _Daddy,”_ a shiver runs up the rigger’s spine but Alfred is blind to it, “Just touch me once, _please.”_

An outstretched hand gently pushes him against the bed so that he is on his back against the sheets. He feels the other straddle him, and realizes that he’s stripped off his clothing as well. The hand splayed out over his chest trails down to his bound member, wiping away the precum that had begun to bead at the slit. Kiku is having a hard time holding himself back from completely ravishing the boy beneath him, wanting nothing more than to give Alfred exactly what he wants so long as he calls him “daddy” one more time - but he restrains himself. Asserts the dominant role. Takes pleasure in seeing Alfred squirm as he strokes him.

He bucks into Kiku’s hand, back arching into the touch. Kiku leans down to press open-mouthed kisses against his jaw. “God, _please -_ I’ll be so good, don’t fucking _tease_ me anymore -”

 _“Language,”_ The raven-haired boy enjoys biting down on Alfred’s ear lobe a little more than he should have, pulling lightly before letting go. “What a dirty mouth.”

“I’m sorry, but can you please just _fuck_ me already, daddy, I need you so badly -”

Kiku turns a deaf ear to every word other than “daddy”, moving south to suck a bruise onto his neck. He’s terribly erect and near bursting himself, but he doesn’t want this to end just yet. He doesn’t want to let Alfred out of the ropes until he’s gasping and struggling to catch his breath after he’s finished taking him.

However, he does reach for the lube in his backpack to begin prepping him. “You're extra needy tonight. Don’t tell me the collar’s gotten you all hot and bothered.”

A slick finger prods at his entrance and Alfred bites his lip to suppress a moan. “S-So what if it has? I... like it.” The ending of his sentence trails off into a mumble. “Makes me feel like you own me. Like I'm your toy.”

Another finger is added. Alfred whimpers. “You like being a toy? _My_ toy?”

“Yes,” he answers with no hesitation, his heart hammering against his chest almost painfully. “Yes, yes, _yes,_ I do, I love it, and I love _you,_ Kiku, I love you _—”_

Kiku stops.

Alfred realizes what he’s just said. What he’s been saving for a more _appropriate_ time, when he wasn't tied up and being fingered. His freckled cheeks flush. He can't see Kiku and that _scares_ him suddenly. He needs to see his face, his reaction to those three words which were uttered at the wrong time and wrong place but maybe Kiku won’t take it seriously, will think it’s a joke or an arousal factor to their play—

There’s a pair of lips meeting his hungrily, yanking him from his thoughts as two warm and slightly wet hands cup his face. His lips are soft and leave Alfred breathless, panting for air between kisses and tongue. The blindfold is pulled off from his eyes and he meets deep brown, the most perfect pair of chocolate brown eyes that he could eat up and never get sick of. To his relief, there is no signs of anger or surprise; an emotion so strong is swimming in those chocolate dipped eyes that it nearly has the blonde’s mind reeling from whiplash.

“Do you mean it?” The question is spoken so, _so_ softly.

Alfred treads on the thin ice, pouring his heart into his words. _“Yes._ I love you and your rope and your cold hands and your perfect smile. Every part of you.”

Kiku looks as if he wants to laugh, but only closes his eyes and rests his forehead against Alfred’s, licks his lips, and says, “I _love_ you, Alfred Jones.”

He can’t wait anymore. The emotions are running too high and there’s time to be cheesy after he’s been used. “Then _hurt_ me already.”

There’s one more kiss, then he’s being stretched out once more with three fingers instead of two. Alfred shivers when they’re pulled away, and nearly smiles when the familiar head of Kiku’s cock brushes against his entrance. Finally, _finally_ Kiku enters him and he throws his head back against the pillow beneath him, lets out a cry that borders a scream. The sound is gorgeous (Kiku will _never_ get enough of Alfred’s voice, be it gasping and moaning or laughing and joking), and the asian responds with the slowest of thrusts - a tease. The blonde wriggles his hips, briefly cursing the ropes tied around his torso and arms.

_“Move.”_

His hips are held in place, nails digging into the skin because Kiku knows there wouldn’t be any fun without the pain. “Ask nicely.”

Alfred regrets bringing up the “d” word. Kiku’s enjoying it much more than he thought he would. “Please, daddy.”

It does the trick. He’s moving and filling him up wonderfully, leaving him an absolute mess against the bed. The rope tied around the base of his member is tight and he aches to be touched, but the rigger is merciless, keeping his hands on his hips and pain constant against the sun-kissed skin there. The rhythm is perfect, and when that sweet spot is hit over and over again Alfred sees stars.

Words spill from his mouth, a mixture of “daddy” and “I love you” said like a mantra as his climax nears. It absolutely melts Kiku’s heart and he knows that the both of them are close; after those three words were spoken, it was like a dam breaking. Neither of them could get enough of each other and they wanted this moment to last and end all at once, craved the orgasmic high and the sickly sweet “I love you”s.

“Sit up,” Kiku doesn’t leave Alfred as he gives the command. Despite the ropes, Alfred manages to sit up, his face flushed and hair sticking his his forehead with sweat. “Good boy.”

In moments the bounds are undone, and Alfred doesn’t have time to be impressed by the speed at which Kiku has the knots behind him undone because the shorter boy is kissing him again with that same hunger and ferocity that leaves him breathless. He moves his hands - he can _move_ his hands, he can finally _touch_ Kiku - up to cup his cheeks, and barely registers that he’s being pushed back down onto the bed to finish where they left off. Hips snap against his and he break the kiss to moan, Kiku taking his hands away from his cheeks to instead hold them down against the bed as well, lacing their fingers together tightly.

“I love you,” The words leave the rigger’s mouth in a pant. Alfred thinks the way his ebony hair is matting to his face is beautiful. “I love you, I love you, _I love you.”_

The release is coming fast - too fast, slow _down,_ make the clock go back - and neither of them are prepared when it hits like a wave crashing against the ocean. Alfred isn’t sure what he screams (it’s Kiku’s name, but his mind is screaming an “I love you”), but hears his own name being groaned by that voice he can never get enough of.

They catch their breaths, Kiku collapsing onto Alfred’s torso after pulling out. He notes through half lidded eyes that there’s a bit of the blonde’s release on the ropes. They’re pushed to the side, falling to the floor. “I’ll have to wash these ropes. Again.”

Alfred laughs, but it’s breathless. “Do it later. Stay with me for a bit.”

He doesn’t say anything for a moment, watching Alfred’s chest rise and fall. When he does speak, his voice is quiet. “I’ll stay for a bit longer than that. If you don’t mind.”

He’s suddenly being embraced, held to Alfred’s chest. “No, I like that better. Stay as long as you want.” No second thought is given as he sighs a dreamy confession. “I love you, Kiku.”

Alfred could say it for eternity, and Kiku could listen with a fluttering heart.


	5. sweater weather

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to the anon who commented something about panties, this one's for you —✩  
> i actually started working on this before i read that comment, i thought it was a funny coincidence, haha!

“Babe, are you almost done? You’ve been in there for a while...”

“No, I don’t think I have this on right - I look ridiculous.”

“I’ll be the judge of that, just get your butt out here already.” 

The curtain to the changing room is pushed to the side hesitantly, only half revealing creamy skin and the soft blue lace of a babydoll lingerie. Kiku’s blush bled down to his collarbones. “Alfred, I-I’m too pale, and I don’t have the curves for this -”

His protests and excuses fall on deaf ears, wide, ocean colored eyes glued to the skin that the curtain isn’t concealing. The soft blue color of the lace complimented his skin perfectly, nearly transparent and leaving little to the imagination. He couldn’t see, but the fleece panties that went with the top were a deeper shade of blue, tiny pink bows on both the front and back sides of the lingerie. Baby blue garterbelts held up a pair of smooth, white stockings. 

Convincing Kiku to try on lingerie was possibly one of his  _ greatest  _ ideas yet. 

“Keeks.” His voice cut through the other’s words, silencing him. “You’re probably the hottest fucking thing I’ve seen.”

He gripped the curtain tightly before turning back into the small changing room, pushing the it back in place. “You’re - just saying that because we’re dating. I’m taking this off.” 

Alfred sighs and takes a quick look over his shoulder before drawing the curtain back, stepping into the room. Kiku is working on unclipping one of the garterbelts. “Touch that garterbelt and you lose your ride back to campus.” 

The asian is unfazed, though the blush is still present on his face. “Complain all you want, Alfred. I can’t pull this off.”

Warm hands rest on lace-clad hips, gentle but firm. Alfred rests his head in the crook of Kiku’s neck and shoulder, eyes never leaving the mirror in front of them. Despite what Kiku said about himself, the blonde could think of no one more gorgeous in any piece of clothing. He was beautiful in anything he did, whether it was as a merciless rigger or a bashful college junior. 

Alfred’s breath tickles Kiku’s neck, and a shiver runs down his spine. Alfred smiles. “I dunno know about you, but I can find plenty of curves. Like, here...” His hands run up and down his sides, accentuating the dip of both of his hips. “...and here...” They dip lower, running over the curves of his sides before cupping his fleece covered ass. Kiku bites his lip, shuts his eyes. He can’t watch himself be touched. Somehow, that’s too embarrassing. “ _ Especially  _ here, might I add.” 

His hands are warm, going lower and lower, sliding across soft fleece and cold skin. It’s rare for Alfred to suddenly take charge, but Kiku is not objecting in the slightest. His breathing is quickening, heart rate increasing, blush growing brighter by the second. Yes, it’s rare for Alfred to take charge, but when he does, Kiku melts against his touches, the switch is flipped inside his head and he isn’t in control of the situation anymore, but he doesn’t  _ care.  _ When Alfred takes charge, he isn’t merciless or sadistic like himself would be, God, no. He doesn’t just take and take and take. 

He’s the opposite. Only wanting to give, give,  _ give _ . 

It’s when Kiku feels himself being stroked through the fabric of his panties that he realizes where they are, eyes snapping open. He makes no move to push Alfred’s hand away, however. The other changing rooms were empty. “We’re in a  _ changing room. _ Is this really the best place..?”

“Says the guy who’s given me blowjobs during the worst times.” His voice is hushed. “Besides, we’ve got lube. And you look too perfect for me  _ not  _ to touch.”

The ebony-haired boy almost smirks, were it not for the wandering hand snaking up to pinch one of his nipples under the fabric of the babydoll top. “Y-You used to be so self-conscious. Where did  _ that _ innocent boy go?”

“He went and met you.” An open mouthed kiss is placed on the side of Kiku’s neck, and that seems to be the breaking point for him.  

Alfred is (roughly, but he likes to see Kiku’s eagerness) shoved against one of the walls of the small changing room, the collar of his shirt being pulled down to meet a pair of greedy lips, to which he responds with as much appetite. His hands are still on Kiku’s hips, pressing him closer with a tight grip. 

Despite their heated situation, something still nagged Alfred in the back of his mind. Switching their positions so that Kiku was against the wall, he broke away from the kiss to trail kisses down the other’s jaw and neck. The asian angled his head to allow more access, stifling a moan with his hand. The other changing rooms may have been empty, but that didn’t mean they could be as loud as they usually were. Neither of them were particularly quiet in situations such as this. 

“I don’t know how you can’t see what I see,” The blonde murmurs against porcelain skin, warm hands teasing both nipples beneath thin fabric. Kiku’s breath hitches at the contact. “Every bit of you is beautiful. I’m in love with your body.”

His words - though hushed - are not unheard. Alfred never simply  _ gave  _ compliments; he  _ showered  _ them over Kiku. They were never half-hearted or tossed out casually, they were said with such sincerity and full of so much  _ love  _ that it almost made the asian sick. They were uttered like praises to a deity, prayers whispered in a gentle, honey syrup voice that only hoped to be heard. 

Kiku heard them every time, of course. Every syllable, every praise, every worship. This time was no different. It made his legs tremble and mind short circuit until he was nothing but a blushing, moaning mess in Alfred’s - safe, warm, untouchable,  _ homely -  _ arms. 

He pulled Alfred so that they were face to face, cupping his (slightly flushed, he realizes with a breathless chuckle) freckled cheeks. “You’re,” a kiss, “too,” another, “much, Alfred.” Another, and then he’s noticing something behind the blonde; the bag he had come into the store with was settled onto the bright pink barrel chair stuffed into the corner of the changing room. Alfred follows Kiku’s gaze behind him, a sly grin growing across his features. 

Kiku is already moving, tossing the bag onto the floor next to the chair and pushing Alfred down onto it, straddling him. Experienced hands begin unbuckling his belt, undoing the button and zipper with ease. It isn’t a surprise to see that the american was already hard, and Kiku plans to take full advantage of the boost in self confidence Alfred had just given him. He rolls his hips against his erection, drawing out a groan from Alfred. 

The lace of the panties is incredibly soft against his cock.  _ “Fuck,  _ Kiku.” 

“Did seeing me in lingerie get you this hard?” He almost laughed. The lube was tucked into the bag on the floor, which he briefly dips down to fish for. 

_ “Yes,  _ and we are so buying it.” Before Kiku could hand the small bottle to him, he places both hands on the other’s hips, thumbing the edges of the stockings. 

Kiku doesn’t trust the innocent grin on his lips one bit. “You want something.”

Alfred chuckles. He knew him too well after a year’s worth of facial expressions. “Maybe. Could you prep yourself for me?” 

The blush on Kiku’s cheeks that had just begun to die down flares up once more. He doesn’t deny his request, however, flipping the cap to the bottle open. “You’re  _ really  _ too spoiled.”

The panties are pushed to the side, and slowly,  _ slowly—  _ a finger is pushed in. Kiku hasn't done this to himself in quite a while and Alfred  _ knows  _ this, damn him, he knows and relishes in the moans Kiku can’t help but let out as he pumps and stretches himself. The Asian keeps his eyes shut tight, breaths coming out in pants while two more fingers are added. His free hand had dropped the bottle of lube onto Alfred’s lap just before he began, and now holds the fabric of the blonde’s shirt with a vice-like grip. Yes, Kiku hasn’t done this to himself since before he met Alfred and to be doing it again in front of a blonde, freckled audience only made his dick twitch in anticipation. 

The sight of his boyfriend fingering himself in lacy lingerie was something straight from a wet, lucid dream, but Alfred knows better. It’s because he knows better that he can hardly keep his eyes off of Kiku, drinking in every little detail of his submissive side, dizzy from the strangled moans leaving his mouth. Even when stifling moans in the middle of an adult store dressing room, Kiku manages to look beyond gorgeous in Alfred’s eyes. 

Even more so when he’s growing impatient. He pulls his fingers away before grinding down on the boy’s length. “I’m-I’m fine already, can you just -”

Alfred is way ahead of him, holding Kiku’s hips in place above the head of his cock. It isn’t instant or merciless as Kiku would have done it; no, his hips are lowered slowly, gently -  _ so  _ fucking gently, please, Alfred, be just a  _ little  _ rougher - until he’s practically sitting in the blonde’s lap, full of him. It sends a shiver down both of their spines, makes Alfred bite his lip and Kiku whimper. 

It may be slightly unfamiliar for him, but the ebony-haired boy doesn’t think twice before raising his hips, beginning to bounce against his lap. His hands are still fisted against the american’s shirt, eyes shut and eyebrows knit together. Riding Alfred felt almost as wonderful as dominating him. Almost.

“Look at you  _ go,”  _ Alfred manages to laugh, short of breath and yet full of  _ something  _ (love, Kiku would like to think, and he would be completely right). “God, you’re so fucking perfect, babe.” 

The praise isn’t new but it affects Kiku all the same, his heart skipping a beat. His superior act during their usual play is completely scrapped when Alfred begins the worship, greedy hands and mouth traveling up his chest to tease and bite, neck soon to be blooming with bruises that won’t disappear no matter how much makeup is applied. 

“Touch me.” The request borders begging. Kiku doesn’t slow the pace one bit, dipping down to meet Alfred’s lips sloppily (and he could care less because he’s so  _ goddamn close  _ because no one’s called him gorgeous or beautiful with so much love like Alfred does and no one makes him  _ happy  _ like Alfred does). “Fucking  _ touch  _ me, Alfred, I’m so  _ close -” _

An an instant he’s being stroked, slick with precome and aching almost painfully for release. The blonde’s hips begin to meet Kiku’s as they both sense the familiar tightness in their bellies, coiling tighter and tighter with every thrust and stroke. 

Kiku comes pressed against Alfred, twitching and biting down on his shirt to suppress his moans, Alfred following soon after. The high is too short - it’s always too short - and though they’re panting and  _ almost  _ tired enough to fall asleep, Kiku realizes something. 

He doesn’t move from nuzzling the american’s neck. “I think we’ve stained the lingerie. And your shirt.” 

“Well, even more reason to buy it. It’s practically ours, now.” Alfred brings a hand up to run through Kiku’s hair. “And we don’t have tissues.”

The asian chuckles. “This was...a bad idea.” 

“You could always use a plug.  _ That  _ sounds sexy.”

“Seriously, where did innocent Alfred go?” 

“You just wanna corrupt him all over again.” 

Their giggles could be heard by the shoppers outside, but they didn’t mind. The plush chair in the small fitting room was comfortable and neither of them planned to move for at least another ten minutes. They could face the embarrassment of purchasing cum stained lingerie later.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i did extensive research for cute lingerie on victoria's secret lolol  
> it was nice to write kiku as a bottom, but.......it was weird not writing alfred beggin for sex lmao


	6. wires

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a lil holiday update!!

When Alfred arrives at Kiku’s dorm room, he is holding a bundle of Christmas tree lights in one hand, and a tall cup of peppermint mocha in the other. He’s smiling brightly all the while. 

Kiku eyes the lights, but reaches for his coffee first. The peppermint is cool against his lips, following the warmth of the mocha. “I don’t have a Christmas tree.”

“I didn’t expect you to. You aren’t even christian,” Alfred chuckles, following the boy into his room and kicking off his shoes. “They were on sale, though, and you know, they’re  _ kind  _ of like regular rope...”

The lights are set between them on the bed, and Kiku glances from the tiny bulbs to Alfred. This may be one of his better ideas. “It might be uncomfortable with the bulbs. They could poke you.”

The blonde scoffed, leaning over to pluck the coffee from Kiku’s hands to take a sip. “I doubt I’ll notice them while I’m on my back getting fucked, Keeks.” 

Well. Kiku couldn’t argue with that. 

Working with wires is certainly different from working with rope, but the concept remained the same. He simply had to be gentle with the knots, and make sure to point the bulbs away from Alfred’s body. 

They are much thinner than the rope he used, as well. The dark green went well against the other’s tanned skin, and while the lights were turned off, Kiku couldn’t wait to see how they looked on his skin. From the way Alfred is shivering, he is clearly eager to see the results as well. 

The asian loops the wires around Alfred’s left wrist and one of the bedposts, repeating the action with the right wrist afterwards. He leaves his legs free, but does wrap a bit of the wires around his ankles - not too tightly, but tight enough to keep him from undoing them. His upper half is already covered with wires in a rectangular pattern, emphasizing his chest and running down his abdomen towards his lower half. More lights circle his waist, rounding towards his backside to tighten around his ass and thighs. 

Then, the dorm lights are turned off, and Kiku plugs the Christmas lights into the outlet behind his bed frame. 

Low lights - blue, green, red - illuminate Alfred’s skin against the darkness, and Kiku was sure his heart was going to stop right then and there. Never has Alfred looked so -  _ enticing  _ as he did in that moment. The lights compliment him so  _ beautifully,  _ bringing attention to the most sensitive parts of his body that the rigger knew so well, had memorized and could find them all in the dark. 

He looks ethereal. As if he didn’t belong on Kiku’s cheap, lumpy mattress from Ikea. No, he belonged on the most expensive of mattresses, with the silkiest of sheets and freshest of rose petals. 

Alfred deserved so much more than what Kiku could give him. The painful thought enters his mind for the first time since they had begun dating, but he pushes it far away towards the back of his mind. Right now, Kiku needed to focus on the boy on the bed currently squirming under his intent gaze. 

“You okay?” Alfred’s eyes are so  _ blue  _ even in the dark. Kiku is not sure how he had wound so lucky, and wonders about this as he crawls onto the bed to hover over his bound boy. 

“Yes. You just look so perfect,” His honesty surprises even him as the words leave his lips, and the blonde’s blush is bright against the darkness. “I couldn’t help but stare.”

Those blue eyes dart away for a moment, suddenly shy under Kiku’s eyes. “So I don’t look stupid?” 

The rigger frowns, dipping down to brush his lips against Alfred’s neck.  _ “You’re _ stupid for even asking that question. You’re beautiful, Alfred.” 

He shivers under the touch of soft lips on his neck, kissing so gently that it leaves his head swimming. His insecurities practically melt away under those light touches, and when he feels one of Kiku’s hands snake down towards his chest, he lets his eyes slip shut. His breath comes out as a sigh, “You’re the pretty one. You always have been.” 

Kiku isn’t in the mood to argue verbally. He can show his argument through actions - which he does as he chooses to silence Alfred with his own lips. He doesn’t kiss with the usual hunger that often comes with his kisses; the american is surprised by how  _ sensual _ Kiku is moving his lips against his own, with just a hint of peppermint on them. Just like the touches on his neck, this is making his head swirl with a soft type of pleasure so full of  _ something _ that it almost scares him. He can’t help but lean up towards the man, wanting nothing more than to get as close as physically possible to him -

Until he is pushed back down by a hand on his chest. That same hand pinches one of his nipples and he gasps against Kiku’s lips, craving more of both the harsh and gentle touches. 

A moan escapes him as the raven-haired boy shifts lower, leaving his mouth to instead focus on his chest. His teeth grazes a nipple as his hand continues downward, the feather-light touch trailing down his abdomen to his half-hard cock. 

Kiku takes hold of the base and squeezes, stroking slowly to warm him up. It doesn’t take long to get him up - it never does when it comes to Kiku - and Alfred’s breath is leaving him in pants. Kiku sees this and can’t help but smirk, shifting even lower to ghost his lips over the leaking head. His thumb swipes the small bead, spreading it over the rest of his dick before licking a stripe along the side of it. He repeats the same stripe once more, then takes the head into his mouth, eyes flicking up to meet Alfred’s.

The blonde’s hands are tightened into fists against the bedposts, and he throws his head back against the pillow beneath his head.  _ “Fuck, _ don’t  _ do  _ that.”

Kiku hums, knowing the slight vibration would only drive Alfred mad. He stops sucking for a moment to ask, “Do what?”

“Look at me. It’s so embarrassing...”

“This isn’t the first time I’ve looked at you while giving you head.”

“I-I know, but still,” he licks his lips, turning to hide his face into his bicep. “I still get embarrassed ‘cause it’s you.”

The boy kisses the head of his dick. “You’re so cute, Alfred.” He continues where he left off, taking half of his member into his mouth while stroking the rest of what wasn’t in his mouth. The noises leaving Alfred’s mouth were only fueling him as well as going straight to his own dick, hardening beneath his sweatpants that were beginning to become a bit  _ too _ tight. 

He removes his hand and takes the entirety of his dick into his mouth, keeping Alfred’s hips in place when he felt him buck into his mouth. Alfred was getting desperate for more, but Kiku is in the mood to take things slow. It wasn’t everyday that he sees Alfred like this - lit up and wrapped like his own holiday present. 

Kiku was  _ certainly  _ going to take his time enjoying this present. 

The boy under him groans when the asian pulls away, wiping his mouth. His eyes are half-lidded, and his attempt at a frown is more amusing than anything. “You fucking tease.” 

The rigger had dipped into his side table to fish a clear, plastic bottle out. “I didn’t think you’d appreciate being prepped while dry.”

Alfred mumbles something that along the lines of “just hurry up”, but Kiku doesn’t pay attention as he pops the bottle’s cap off, coating his fingers with just the right amount of lube. He teases his entrance with slow prods, and as he slips a finger inside, he dips down to take the head of Alfred’s dick back into his mouth. The blonde cries out at the combination of both sensations, his back arching into the touches. 

Another finger is added, and Kiku takes more of Alfred into his mouth. He sucks hard but keeps his pace slow, mimicking the pace of his fingers. This time, he lets the boy buck into his mouth to his heart’s content, practically drinking up the moans and curses that leave Alfred’s lips. Kiku’s gag reflex is strong, thankfully - he could feel the tip of his cock barely brush against the back of his throat several times. Once he adds a third finger, the moaning turns into begging. 

“P-Please,” he gasps, wriggling against the binds, “I need to -”

“I know.” Kiku smiles sweetly, not sucking anymore, but using his free hand to continue stroking Alfred’s erection. Alfred doesn’t appreciate the sweetness of that smile. “But you can wait a bit longer.”

The blonde can only blink at his words, watching the boy shuffle for something under the bed. He pulls out a familiar ring - and it dawns on him at that moment that Kiku is  _ not  _ going to let him come any time soon - and clamps it around his already painful erection, wearing that same sickly sweet smile all the while. Now that Alfred was restricted like this, he really  _ did  _ seem like a present waiting to be opened.

Alfred lets his head fall against his pillow once more, wanting to cry in frustration, but absolutely  _ adoring _ how cruel Kiku was all at the same time. It was unfair how contradictive the boy was, and how it managed to attract Alfred, he had no idea. 

(But he would have it no other way, of course.)

Nonetheless, he’s only getting more turned on by the second, and Kiku is doing absolutely  _ nothing _ to help him. He  _ is _ doing things - stripping himself of his sweatpants and briefs, for example - but it is only getting Alfred more  _ excited  _ and  _ not  _ helping him relieve the pain of his arousal. He is completely stuck, both physically and orgasm wise, and the amount of sexual frustration he is currently going through was enough to make tears bead at the corners of his eyes. 

Kiku notices this as he returns to hover over him, and kisses the the tears away. Another kiss is pressed to his forehead, then to both of his eyelids, then his lips. The affection surprises Alfred, but it is in no way unwelcome. If anything, it distracts him from his arousal.

“I love you,” Kiku says after a few silent seconds. There’s a certain soft look in his eyes that makes Alfred fall a bit harder for him in that moment. “You know that, right?”

He smiles and nods, and before he can say anything, the wires around his wrists are loosened enough so he can pull his arms free. Kiku knows how much he likes being bound, but he also knows how much he likes to touch and caress. Which is exactly what he does, pulling the raven-haired boy down for a kiss as he holds his face in his hands. 

“I know. I love you, too.”  _ Even though you’re a real pain in the ass sometimes,  _ he wants to add, but figures he shouldn’t ruin the mood by making him laugh. 

One of his legs is lifted to wrap around Kiku’s hip, and he doesn’t stop the moan that leaves him when he feels the head of his dick push into him. When the entirety is slowly pushed in, he is holding onto the boy above him tightly, nails digging into his back. He does not hesitate to scratch, knowing that the bright red marks would stand out fantastically against the creaminess of Kiku’s skin for days afterwards. 

Kiku sets a leisurely rhythm with his hips - as if he weren’t absolutely dying to drill Alfred into the mattress - and his fingers grip the sheets beneath them tightly. He keeps Alfred from complaining about his pace by drawing out the kiss, licking into his mouth with sensuality. It was slow, everything was so  _ slow  _ and restricted that it was driving the blonde  _ beyond _ mad. In the back of his mind, he knew it was sweet, and that his boyfriend was probably trying to enjoy him being wrapped up with Christmas lights as much as he could, but  _ god fucking dammit  _ if he didn’t pick up  his pace at least the  _ tiniest _ bit or get this stupid cock ring off of him - 

A high pitched moan tears from his throat when Kiku begins stroking him, matching the pace with his thrusts. The asian sits up, keeping a tight grip on Alfred’s hips as he snaps his hips particularly roughly, hitting a certain spot that makes the blonde’s legs tremble and toes curl. “Do you want to come?”

_ Is that even a question?  _ “Y-Yes!”

Another smile, but this one’s lopsided into a smirk. “Then beg.”

Alfred’s eyes had been closed until now, but he tosses his embarrassment to the side and looks up towards the other, timidly keeping eye contact. “Please...” 

“Please what?” Kiku traces the edge of the ring.

“Please,” Alfred swallows hard, his blush reaching his ears, “let me come.” 

All restraint is lost when the ring is taken off, and Kiku wastes no time in giving Alfred exactly what he wants. He can’t help but moan himself as the boy beneath him clamps down on him, focused on hitting deeper and harder than before. Alfred makes to get himself off quickly, moving the hand on his dick faster. 

It doesn’t take long for everything to become too much, throwing both of them over the edge. Alfred’s release is warm against his skin, splattering onto his chest and abdomen in thick ribbons. Simply seeing Alfred undone is enough to bring Kiku to climax, emptying himself out with a few final thrusts. 

The lights are still on, and Kiku idly thumbs one on Alfred’s abdomen. “This was...one of your better ideas.”

Alfred sits up on his elbows, panting slightly. “I figured you liked them. You were taking your stupid time.” 

“You were practically wrapped up for me,” he reaches for the tissues on his side table once he leaves Alfred, handing the box to the blonde. “I wanted to take my time enjoying you.”

“Dummy.” He takes the box, leaning up to peck Kiku’s lips. “I’m all yours to enjoy anytime.” 

Kiku can’t help but grin - and there’s a warmth in his chest that refuses to go away. 


	7. everybody's watching me (uh oh)

“Are you filming?”

“Yeah,” Alfred’s voice is just a bit shaky. Kiku’s eyes flickers from the phone in Alfred’s hand to the dick in his own hand. “Keep going.”

Kiku swallows hard, the blush on his cheeks bright as he follows Alfred’s command, touching the head of his erection to his lips before taking half into his mouth, bobbing his head along the length. The only thing he could think of was the lens to the phone hovering above him.

His jeans tighten just a bit as Alfred bucked into his mouth, running a hand through his hair. He keeps a steady hand on the phone. 

The idea to film something so risqué came from Kiku, and it wasn’t so much for him, but for Alfred. The blonde had  _ subtly _ expressed his interest in a sextape before— “I’d  _ kill  _ for just a video of you going down on me, honey, especially when we’re away from campus”— and since Kiku was always one to spoil Alfred, he didn’t see the harm in humoring him. Besides, now that he was in front of a camera, it was beginning to get very hard to keep a cool facade. He was feeling it.

Alfred’s words of encouragement only fuels him. “That’s good—  _ ah _ — shit, Kiku...”

He hesitates for the smallest of seconds, releasing Alfred from his mouth for a moment to look up towards the boy and his phone, “Would you mind,” he bats his eyes just a bit, “if I touched myself, too?”

Kiku can’t help but smile at the surprise on Alfred’s face, and when he nods, he makes a show out of unbuttoning his jeans, shifting slightly back on the mattress so that the camera could catch him sliding his pants down to reveal his— per Alfred’s request— blue fleece panties. He brings his attention back to Alfred’s cock, rubbing himself through his panties all the while. 

It’s hot under the cold gaze of the phone, and even hotter under his boyfriend’s cool blue eyes. His erection grows harder, stands taller so that it peeks just outside of his panties, and he moves his hand to begin stroking himself slowly. Alfred manages a sly smile when he sees how hard Kiku has gotten, brushing a few strands of hair from his face and cupping his cheek (his cheek that was currently full of his own dick and even that was somehow  _ really  _ fucking hot). 

Kiku lets his eyes flutter closed, the tiniest of moans escaping from the back of his throat. Alfred sees that he’s still stroking himself slowly. 

“Babe,” Alfred says, “Turn around.”

The blush on Kiku’s face deepens. Nonetheless, he leaves Alfred’s dick to take off his pants, tossing them onto the floor of his dorm to follow the commands given to him. He sets his hips just a few centimeters shy of Alfred’s member, close enough to feel its wet warmth. 

The camera doesn’t leave his body the entire time, following his every move like a set of eyes. Kiku is suddenly hyper-aware of his actions, trying hard to remain calm and graceful under the stare of both the lens and the boy leaning against the headboard of the bed. 

There’s a bump poking out from the panties. Alfred pushes on it; Kiku bites his lip. 

“You’re actually wearing it.” Kiku can hear the smile in his voice. His panties are pulled to the side, uncovering the pink diamond plug inside of him. “God, you’re so  _ hot.” _

“You asked me to.” is all Kiku says in reply, leaning onto his elbows to push his ass onto Alfred’s cock. He glances behind him, wordlessly making the request:  _ Touch me.  _

Alfred gets the message loud and clear. Holding the phone with one hand, he keeps the view on Kiku’s entire backside, kneading and squeezing the panty-clad flesh with his free hand. He tugs the lingerie down just below the plug, caressing the skin lightly before raising his hand and bringing it down hard, a loud  _ slap  _ filling the air. Kiku immediately jerks up, but doesn’t make a sound. He stays put on Alfred’s lap, his skin already beginning to redden. 

Another slap. Kiku knows Alfred isn’t using his full strength and he  _ wanted  _ him to, dammit,  _ needed _ Alfred to make him hurt. He groans lowly after he received another hit, wriggling his hips a bit against his cock. “Is that really all you’ve got? I want you to  _ hurt _ me.”

Kiku can sense Alfred’s hesitation, but the safeword hasn’t been said, so he continues on and gives the boy on his lap exactly what he wants.

There’s a brief moment where the hand on his ass is lifted, and then a burst of pain blossoms across his backside. Kiku can’t help but cry out, his voice slightly higher than normal. There’s another, then another, and he balls his hands into fists against the sheets as tears begin to gather behind his shut eyes. It hurts so  _ good  _ and while his legs begin to tremble with every assault, the warmth between his legs threatens to burst at any moment. 

Alfred stops after his skin is a satisfactory shade of pink. Kiku wipes at a tear that managed to streak down his cheek and takes a moment to even out his breathing. The high soon comes down, and he winces at the amount of stinging left behind— though, he is certainly not one to complain. 

The blonde shifts, pulling more of Kiku onto his lap. He pushes down on the plug, moving it around in a circular motion inside of Kiku that sends a shiver up the boy’s spine. 

Alfred pulls it out slowly, reveling in the sounds that leave Kiku. He keeps the phone in front of him, capturing the way the toy leaves him open and practically begging for his dick. 

Fingers dig into the swollen flesh, positioning Kiku’s slick entrance just in front of the head of his cock. Anticipation buzzes through the both of them, and Kiku is just honestly surprised that Alfred hasn’t dropped his phone yet from the overwhelming amount of pleasure that hits both of them when Kiku slides down to meet Alfred’s hips, completely filled with him. 

_ “Fuck,”  _ The blonde groans, keeping his eyes glued to the way Kiku was bouncing in his lap. “Just like that, sweetheart.”

Kiku’s mind replays the breathless way Alfred said “sweetheart” over and over, raising and lowering his hips in a pace that is not too fast nor too slow; he wanted to play into the submissive role as much as he possibly could for this sextape. Which, and he comes to this realization as Alfred takes a hold of one of his hips with a tight, bruising grip, this technically is. 

He strokes himself as he nears his climax, pulling the panties down further to squeeze the base of his cock. It doesn’t take long for him to finish when Alfred picks up the pace, bringing him down harder onto his lap with that same bruising grip. 

He’s left a shivering mess after he comes, slumped against the mattress as he catches his breath. The only thing in his head besides the high from his orgasm is the awareness that  _ Alfred has not come yet.  _

Just as he was about to pick himself up, Kiku is pushed back down, his ass raised to meet Alfred’s hips in a rough thrust. Pleasure jolts through him like electricity - he’s still much too sensitive from just coming. Alfred’s hand stays in firm place on his hip. 

“Who said you were finished?” A hot chill runs down Kiku’s spine, and he licks his lips as the hand moves from his hip to caress his backside. It leaves, then comes back down hard in another _slap._ “Because I’m sure not done with you.”

Kiku doesn’t swallow the whine that leaves his throat, or stops the smile that spreads across his lips. This video was going to be rather long. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> issa shorter chapter, i was kinda lazy towards the end to go into a full-on smut scene ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> the spanking bit was actually inspired by an absolutely fantastic fellow writer and friend, @mudamuda. my stuff is probably more vanilla and amateur-ish, but nevertheless, they're a major inspiration!!


	8. you get me so high

Alfred didn’t think he’d ever see Kiku cry.

Kiku is one of those types who doesn’t like to show those kind of emotions in front of others - which is fine, of course. Alfred shows enough emotion for the both of them. He would take the few laughs and smiles he could get from Kiku and save them in a lockbox in his heart.

Crying, though - that was rare. Alfred hardly cries anymore, himself. But he gets a call around two in the morning as he was studying for an exam, and while he was expecting it to be either be a) a booty call, or b) an “I-can’t-sleep-so-will-you-talk-me-to-sleep” conversation, he still answers with a grin because it was Kiku.

His grin dies on his lips when he hears sniffling on the other line. “Keeks? Are you - What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, it’s... I don’t know why I’m calling you about it,” He pauses, taking a deep breath. Alfred sets his pen down. “I haven’t had a nightmare in years.”

“Aw, baby. Do you want to talk about it?”

Kiku nods before realizing Alfred couldn’t see him. “No, but can you come over, anyways?”

The blonde glances at his notes before shutting his economics book. “I’ll be at your room in ten.”

Kiku keeps to himself when Alfred arrives, which doesn’t really surprise him. What surprises him is how pale he looked (more so than usual), and the way he practically clings to Alfred when the blonde goes in for a hug.

Something’s wrong, but Kiku wouldn’t talk about it directly. That’s just how he is, and Alfred’s come to respect that part of him that keeps secrets.

Kiku insists it’s nothing, but the way he holds onto Alfred’s hand says differently.

“Well, honey, it was obviously _something,”_ Alfred sighs, setting his chin on top of Kiku’s head. He took the liberty of wrapping them both in two blankets, sitting atop Kiku’s bed. “You look like you saw one of those freaky Japanese spirits from those scary movies you like.”

He hoped to get a laugh, but Kiku makes no noise. Not even a chuckle.

The boy under his chin mumbles, “It really was nothing. You can go back to your dorm if you want.”

“As if. I’m staying right here.” Alfred says, rubbing circles in Kiku’s back. “You don’t have to talk about it. But I’m not going anywhere because, and I dunno if you know this, I actually like you a lot and care a whole ass lot about you.”

At last, a small, blink-and-you’ll-miss-it smile spread onto Kiku’s face. Alfred congratulates himself for pulling that out of him, at least.

Nothing is said for the next few minutes, until Alfred gets an idea.

“Hey.” He pulls back to meet Kiku’s eyes. “Let’s get out of here.”

* * *

 

California’s streets stay buzzing especially after dark, the temptations of local bars and nightclubs easy to find between street lights and tall office buildings. Drive far enough west, and buildings are replaced with long stretches of sand, comfortably cooled down after the day’s heat. Alfred had no idea where he would go, but as long as they were off campus, he figured they could make it up as they went.

Well - as _he_ went. Kiku is still exceptionally quiet, leaning with his head in his arms against the open window of the car.

The wind whips his hair as Alfred makes a turn from a busy road to a wider, emptier one. Alfred smiles at this. “Your hair’s gotten longer.”

“Has it?”

“You should grow it out.”

“I don’t think so. I would look like my brother.”

Alfred scrunches his nose up. “Yikes. I really don’t want to think of his face in bed.”

“Then it stays short.” Kiku says. “Where are we going?”

“I dunno. Figure I’d take you outta there, though. Going somewhere different helps me clear my head sometimes.”

The street lamps overhead have begun to grow further and further apart as the road becomes emptier and emptier. It reminds Alfred of something from a horror movie, and Kiku chuckles when he proposes the idea of a ghost lurking in the shadows of the trees to their right.

Besides the scattered trees and the road ahead of them, there isn’t much else to look at. The radio is shut off since Alfred knows Kiku prefers the comfortable silence between them, and the only other noises are from the few bumps on the road to the sound of another car whizzing past them. Kiku insists he isn’t sleepy, despite the several times Alfred catches him dozing off.

“It’s okay if you wanna sleep a little.”

“I’m fine.”

“Keeks, I know what you’re doing,” The blonde murmurs, keeping his eyes straight on the road ahead of them. Kiku lifts his head from his arms to look at Alfred. “Avoiding sleep so you won’t have another nightmare. You’re just gonna be really tired and really cranky tomorrow.”

Kiku doesn’t say anything in response, and removes himself from the window. The window stays rolled down so he would at least have the stars to look at.

Alfred chances a glance towards him and follows his gaze. “Can you find constellations and stuff?”

He shakes his head. “My parents showed me when I was younger. I’ve forgotten.”

Trees give way to a small beach the longer they drive, and Alfred takes the first exit.

The small parking lot is as desolate as the rest of the beach. Once they park, Kiku asks, tiredly, “What are we doing here?”

Alfred doesn’t reply, only gets out of the car. Kiku stays seated, watching him go towards the shoreline, and debates staying in the car or going after him. With a heavy sigh, he undoes the seatbelt buckle and slide out of the car himself, shivering against the cool, salty breeze from the ocean.

When Alfred takes his bomber and shirt off, Kiku begins to run.

Alfred’s got his pants halfway down when he finally catches up to him. “Alfred, the water is probably _freezing.”_

“It’s a beach,” the blonde replies, “What else do you do at a beach?”

“You could just _sit.”_ Alfred drops his bomber jacket and glasses into Kiku’s arms. “Alfred, you’re going to get sick, and then you’re going to whine until I take care of you, like you _always_ do.” Alfred continues to ignore him, walking towards the edge of the water with just his boxers on. “We don’t even have a towel for you to dry off with!”

There’s a splash. Kiku rolls his eyes and sits cross-legged on the sand, shrugging on Alfred’s jacket, mumbling “dumbass” under his breath.

Alfred yelps as he comes back up for air. “Jesus! It’s fucking cold!”

“I just said it’d be cold.”

“I know,” He says, slicking his hair back and out of his face, “I thought you would eventually come in with me to try to stop me.”

“Why the hell would I do that?”

“‘Cause you love me?”

If it were possible to roll one’s eyes harder, Kiku would have done it. “I love you, but I’m not going to freeze just to save you from getting sick.”

“Even if I were drowning?” Alfred grins. “And I needed a sexy lifeguard to help save me?”

Kiku smiles. “I don’t know CPR.”

“So you would let me _die?”_

“You shouldn’t have dragged me out here and jumped into the ocean.”

Alfred scoffs, leaning back to float against the gentle waves. “I did it to cheer you up, ya meatball.”

Said meatball scrunches his nose up at the pet name. “Don’t call me that. And I didn’t need cheering up.” He pulls his knees to his chest, “It was just a stupid nightmare.”

“Well, whatever nightmare it was, it fucked with you. So it’s my job to un-fuck you.”

“That doesn’t sound right.”

“You know what I mean.” Alfred swims closer towards the shoreline until he could walk. He shivers when the cool air hits him, “Okay, I’m done. Since _somebody_ didn’t wanna get in with me.”

Kiku doesn’t reply, only keeps his eyes on the waves as they lap against the shoreline. Alfred runs his hands through his hair again, only partially regretting his impulsive decision to take a swim in a near freezing ocean. He plops down on the sand next to Kiku, lying against the chilly sand, knowing full well that when he sat back up, his back and boxers would probably be caked with sand. He keeps his eyes on the sky above them, the stars blurry specs hiding behind pale, translucent clouds.

“You’re impulsive.” Kiku says after some time.

Alfred only tucks his hands under his head. “And you’re boring.”

“Oh, am I? I don’t remember you using that word to describe me when you’re -”

“Gosh, okay, okay, you’re only boring in certain situations.” Alfred stops him before he could go into detail, sitting up to accept his glasses as Kiku holds them out for him to take. “And I might be impulsive, but remember that time in that sex toy store? You weren’t complaining then. _Plus_ the time you went down on me when I was talking to Francis outside of my dorm.”

Kiku leans back on the palms of his hands, stretching his legs out towards the shoreline. “That was fun. Your expression was priceless.”

“I think Francis knew what was happening. He kept smirking at me in class the next day.”

“You’re paranoid.” Kiku says. “Or rather, I’m the paranoid one, I suppose.”

“What do you mean?”

He slides his hands through the sleeves of Alfred’s jacket, the clothing fitting much too big on him. Alfred always thought that was endearing, especially when he caught Kiku sleeping with it on one afternoon after he forgot it at his dorm room. “My nightmare. It was about you.”

The blonde puts his glasses back on, focusing all of his attention on the boy next to him. “What...did I do?”

“We fought. You said you were tired of me, and that you found someone better,” Kiku sighs, bringing his knees to chest again to wrap his arms around. His voice is as soft as the clouds in the sky when he speaks. “Then you just...left.”

Alfred doesn’t say anything, and Kiku doesn’t look up from the sand between his toes to see his reaction. He didn’t want Alfred to see how glossy his eyes were just from entertaining the thought of him leaving.

“It was so _real._ Like it could happen any time.” He says. “And I didn’t expect to get so close to you. I didn’t expect to _—_ to actually love you or want you as anything other than something for sex.” Once he started talking, he just kept _talking_ , and dammit, if he didn’t sound like Alfred when he rambled about this and that. “I really thought I would just get over you. I thought _I’d_ get tired of you before you got tired of me, so I wouldn’t have to actually prepare myself to lose you.”

The sand is too blurry to see through the hot tears in his eyes, and he blinks them away, rubbing at his eyes with the sleeve of Alfred’s jacket. “And this is all so _stupid_ , to push all of this on you. It’s selfish and I’m _—_ I’m sorry.”

To save himself from any more embarrassment, Kiku buries his head in his arms, cursing the tears that refuse to stop. And the fact that Alfred isn’t saying anything back to him - _anything,_ he isn’t reassuring or soothing or hushing, like Kiku expected him to do - only makes his stomach churn and frustration grow.

Kiku doesn’t have time to ask Alfred to _do_ something because he’s on his back looking up into two pools of blue, the same ones he fell in love with two and a half years ago. Only this time, they’re narrowed and the most serious he’s ever seen them, and Kiku cannot stop the shiver that runs up his back at the intensity.

“You _are_ stupid,” Alfred says, and for a split second, Kiku believes it. “And you _are_ selfish.”

He dips down to nip at Kiku’s neck particularly hard, making him yelp in surprise. Alfred quickly moves to suck on the area, bruising the skin before mouthing his way lower towards his collarbones. Kiku’s mind is reeling from the pain and pleasure to even ask what Alfred meant, welcoming this by angling his neck to give Alfred more access to do what he wanted.

Maybe Alfred is angry that Kiku would ever suggest him leaving. Or maybe he wants one last fuck before he actually leaves. Either way, Kiku doesn’t want him to stop. He wants to be selfish, if only for one more night.

He would have preferred if Alfred wasn’t damp and salty from the ocean, but Kiku doesn’t complain when Alfred moves from his collarbones to his lips, a hand snaking under his shirt to pinch at a nipple. He bites on his bottom lip and pulls, slipping his tongue into Kiku’s mouth when he gasps. The hand under his shirt moves to slip under and past the waistband of the boy’s sweatpants, stroking the growing erection there.

Kiku doesn’t realize Alfred is saying actual words until he bites down on his neck again, the brief pain yanking him out of his own mind. “Wh-Wha _—_?”

“You dick, you’re not even paying attention,” Alfred growls, sitting up to straddle him. “God, get out of your head for two fucking seconds.”

He tries to tell him to wait, slow down, I wasn’t in my head I was trying to enjoy this moment because I don’t know if it’ll be the last time, but before any of that could get out of his mouth the blonde had Kiku’s pants and briefs pulled down as well as his own boxers. Alfred grinds his hips against Kiku’s, pressing their dicks together before wrapping a hand around both of them, stroking as he grinds his hips again and again in a steady rhythm.

Kiku groans, arching his back into the touch. Despite Alfred being oddly snappy with him, Kiku aches to return the favor and touch Alfred in some way, _any_ way, but just as he tries to sit up, a hand meets his throat and he’s pushed back down against the sand roughly.

“Stay put,” Alfred breathes, nails digging into his neck.

The only thing kiku can manage is a whine. His hands are itching to move but he keeps them still, opting to just lie back and enjoy the way Alfred’s hand around his neck was tightening bit by bit, giving way to the pleasure of being ground on.

Alfred didn’t press so hard that he couldn’t breathe, keeping his grip just loose enough so that it was an intoxicating struggle to get air. Kiku didn’t even try to struggle anymore, desperately trying to move his hips to match Alfred’s rhythm _—_ and every time he tried, the hand around his throat would press down for a few seconds to put him back in his place.

“You’re so _—”_ Alfred’s breath hitches in his throat, speeding his pace, “ _—_ fucking perfect. Every part of you. I could never get tired of you.”

Kiku is only half listening; he’s drunk off the mix of pleasure and pain. He brings his hands up to the one around his neck, if anything to hold onto something as he felt his climax building in his belly, moving his hips despite Alfred’s warnings. He _needs_ to make this last longer, needs to revel in the perfect way Alfred’s hand felt around his neck, needs to enjoy being so submissive and at his mercy.

Alfred isn’t too far off from his own peak, thrusting and stroking at a rough pace. The boy under him suddenly jolts, and watching Kiku’s eyes roll back in absolute pleasure at being choked is enough to bring Alfred over the edge, riding out the waves of pleasure that hit him in slow thrusts against Kiku. There’s a sticky warmth on his hand and splattered onto Kiku’s shirt.

Kiku takes a gulpful of air when Alfred removes his hand, chest heaving as he pants to properly catch his breath. Alfred holds himself up with the hand that was around Kiku’s neck, slightly unsure of what to do with his now-sticky hand. He chooses to keep it at his side.

“Alfred,” Kiku says between breaths, sitting up onto his elbows, “I—”

“No, listen,” the blonde interrupts, moving a bit of Kiku’s hair from his eyes. “Sorry for jumping your bones like that, but... I dunno, it sorta upset me. That you would even _think_ I’d consider breaking this _— us—_ off.”

“Well...”

“No, dude, you’re not listening.” He pulls both of their clothing back on semi-decently, minding the stickiness. “Yeah, your fears and insecurities are valid and shit, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have the same fear, but I’m saying that you don’t have to worry. I’m not going anywhere. Not after these past two and a half years.”

Kiku opens his mouth to say something, but Alfred shakes his head. “Hang on, I’m not done. I’ll say it as much as you need to hear it: you’re stuck with me. You’re freaky as shit and I really, _really_ like that. I mean, yeah, I sure as hell didn’t plan on liking you so much either, but...here we are.”

A breeze blew past them, rustling their hair lightly. Alfred’s hair had semi-dried at this point, and Kiku reached up to card a hand through the waves.

“Here we are.” He repeats, happy to have finally listened.

His hand moves from his hair to cup Alfred’s cheek, leaning up to meet his lips. Alfred pulls him closer _—_ it was _never_ close enough, he could never get enough of Kiku _—_ wishing he could stop time and live in this moment of comfort and relief under the stars and beside the ocean forever.

“I’m sorry,” Kiku says when he’s pulled away, “I should have told you how I felt earlier. But I suppose it wasn’t _all_ bad...”

Alfred quirks an eyebrow, grinning. “You were really into that choking thing, huh?”

“I just didn’t expect it. It was so...primal.”

“You’re swooning over being choked.”

“You swoon over questionable things too, Alfred. I wouldn’t talk.”

After rinsing Alfred’s hand at one of the water fountains near the parking lot and brushing off any sand from unwanted places, the two figure four forty-three am is a good a time as ever to go back to campus. Kiku rides with the window down the entire ride, leaning outside of the window with his head in his arms again to look at the stars. Alfred rolls his window down to help dry his hair a bit more.

There’s a comfortable silence between them as the wind ruffles their hair. They don’t say it out loud, but they have never been more at peace and in love than they are in that moment, beneath the wispy clouds and blinking stars in Alfred’s ratty BMW.

“Hey, Keeks,” Alfred says over the wind, “I think I wanna marry you.”

Blinking, Kiku lifts his head from his arms to look at Alfred. “What?”

“Let’s get married.”

“Right now?” Kiku sputters, cheeks flushing.

“Nah, not right now.” Alfred glances from the road to Kiku, laughing when he sees his blush. “We’re both in school, it’d be too much money and too rushed. When we _do_ get married, I wanna do it right. So, later.”

“Later.”

“Yup.”

Kiku considers this, turning back to the open window. His heart was fluttering. He hides his smile by tucking his head back into his arms.

“...We’ll see.”

That was good enough for Alfred.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk if this is actually the end! i might add a chapter every now and again if i'm ever in the mood for kinky shit. but for now, at least, i'll be takin a break. 
> 
> thank u for reading and kudo/commenting! ♡ this fic has been a RIDE


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